Posts Tagged ‘Advice’

There was a man with four wives. He loved his fourth wife the most and took a great care of her and gave her the best.

He also loved his third wife and always wanted to show her off to his friends. However, he was always had a fear that she might runaway with some other man.
He loved his second wife too. Whenever he faced some problems, he always turned to his second wife and she would always help him out.


He did not love his first wife though she loved him deeply, was very loyal to him and took great care of him. One day the man fell very ill and knew that he is going to die soon.

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Patience and Desires

Posted: May 20, 2015 in Advice
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Shaykh Muhammad Saleem Dhorat mentions:

Whilst I was once sitting with the students of the Jāme‘ah Riyādul ‘Uloom, I posed the following question to them: ‘Imagine two types of fruit: one very attractive and extremely sweet, though with the unfortunate characteristic that its sweetness lasts only for a few seconds and thereafter turns to bitterness; and another which is not attractive at all and tastes very bitter, but after beginning to chew it, the bitterness very rapidly turns into such sweetness that its enjoyment remains in the mouth for hours. If you were given a choice between these two fruits, which one would you prefer?’ 
They all replied: ‘The second one.’

I said: ‘Now, based on this example, try to understand two very important aspects of Dīn: sabr (steadfastness) and shahwat (fulfilment of base desires).’

Elaborating on the first aspect I said: ‘Sabr is to exercise patience during times of distress; to remain steadfast in fulfilling the Commands of Allah ta‘ālā; and to restrain ones self from His disobedience. This quality, like the second fruit, is not attractive at all and initially extremely bitter in taste. However, this bitterness does not last long and soon it is replaced by a long-lasting sweetness.

‘The other aspect is shahwat – the fulfilment of our unlawful desires. In the initial stages it is very attractive and full of enjoyment, but its after effects are very bitter indeed. When first getting involved in unlawful activities such as drug or alcohol consumption or adultery and fornication, no bitterness or loss is felt whatsoever; in fact there is nothing but sweetness. But as the initial effects wear off, all that remain are regret and bitterness. And above all, in the afterlife, this bitterness will remain forever. Allah ta‘ālā says in the Glorious Qur’ān:

But whosoever turns away from My Reminder, verily, for him is a life of hardship, and We shall raise him up blind on the Day of Resurrection. (20:124)

Finally I asked them: ‘So now, my dear students, which of these two should we give preference to – sabr, which will result in our acquiring the sweetness of īmān in this world and the everlasting sweetness of Jannah in the Hereafter, or shahwat, which will result in bitterness in this world and the everlasting bitterness of Jahannam? The choice is yours.’

Their answers all echoed the same thought: ‘We should always give preference to ṣabr which, although preceded by an insignificant amount of bitterness, guarantees everlasting sweetness.’

I said: ‘Alhamdulillāh, May Allah ta‘ālā grant you all barakah in your understanding.

A great saint, Ma‘rūf Karkhī rahimahullāh said:
That bitter item, the end of which is sweetness, is sabr, and that sweet item, the end of which is bitterness, is shahwat.

Let us therefore exercise sabr and fulfil all the Commands of Allah ta‘ālā, no matter how bitter the prospects of doing so may appear, for this bitterness is the doorway to everlasting sweetness.’